Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Time for a pet?

Maybe it's a sign to get a pet when you find that your two year old daughter is carrying around a dead bird and dressing it up with doll accessories.

Friday, June 24, 2011

I am sure every spouse has those cute little quirks that you just learn to love right? Well, Dave has a serious problem with drinking glasses. I know it could be way worse, like he could really love Stargate Sg1 or something, oh wait, bad example. Anyway ever since we were married as Dave leaves for School/work he makes a Carnation Instant Breakfast and heads to his car. Then once a month I realize I have no drinking glasses. I search the house and then I stomp into the kitchen and yell at Dave in my head because I know that every glass I own is in his car.

When I do accost him in the garage later that day, here is what I always find.

(this is just one example of what I pulled from his car)

Now, I know I am not the easiest person to live with. If Dave was writing this it would say.

"How many times do I have to be awakend from a sound sleep by every fire alarm in our house going off. Does Jill not realize that when sugar gets too hot it smokes?) So maybe I should just except Dave for who he is and buy paper cups.

Friday, June 17, 2011

Lessons learned this week

1. Your love on John Wayne can border on the unhealthy side. I mean, I love the Duke too, but I am not going to replace family photo's with pictures of him on my mantle.

2. Jon said that Elephants have bigger germs than everyone else. Actually that makes total sense.

3. All you need is a catchy name and you can open a restaurant. We have a new travel trailer parked in the bank parking lot with a big sign "Happy Buddha Thai food" or something like that. It does have an "Open" sign on the window so I think I should go there for lunch.

4. Jon also let me know that we get milk by the cows Gutters. There are gutters that run from the cow into the container and milk just runs down them.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Road Rage is Going to Push me Over the Edge

Ya know? If my horrible eating habits don't kill me, my raising blood pressure while driving will. I have never really experienced road rage until moving here to Montana. There are a few things that make me truly want to hit someone.

#1 : Map Quest is useless here. I don't even know why I try when 9 times out of 10 it says "Address not found" but close by is City center Hamilton. Woo hoo so at least I will always be able to find the Coffee Cup Cafe.

#2: When map quest doesn't work, the person giving you directions says to turn at a place that USED to be there. "Oh yea, do you remember where the duck pond used to be? Turn east there" This has happened to me more than once.

#3: There are many forms of transportation that DO NOT belong going down the middle the road.
1. Golf Carts:
2. Horses
3. Four Wheelers: Yes I am talking to you Rachel Hudson, your lucky you didn't hear the commentary in my head while I followed you going 10 miles an hour down Golf Course Road.

So when your blood pressure is rising and you turn at the light to give a deadly stare-down to the person on the four-wheeler, make sure they are not in your ward first.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Toilet Paper is for Amateur's

Anyone can sneak in your yard in the dead of night when everyone is sleeping and cover your tree's with toilet paper. But the youth here in Montana can sneak into your garage in broad daylight with you in the next room eating dinner and paint your cars.

My favorite part of the whole thing was Dave didn't wake up early enough to go wash his car so he had to arrive at the high security lab parking garage with his car saying:

"I'm the bug king"

"I love Amoeba's"

It totally made my day.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

I could have clogged on Broadway

I am a huge fan of Broadway musicals. From a very young age, I wanted to perform on Broadway, so I started singing and dance lessons. Sadly, the only dance available in Evanston at the time was clogging. Side-note: girls can be cloggers but boys take the chance of getting beat up. Even though I never did clogg on Broadway, I think my boys might have a serious chance.

Ben: He had to do a musical number at scouts so he made himself a banjo and played like one of those guys in "Oh Brother, where art thou?" (Seriously, the stupidest movie ever made... Don't tell Dave it is one of his favorites." )

Jon: There has never been a better "Weed" in a school play than Jon. He was so impressive as the dancing rapping weed ,that later some random guy stopped us in town and said "Hey you were the Weed who had all the dance moves. You were awesome." Jon just gave him a point and a click of tongue and said "Yep"

(Jonny is the weed right in front of the garden gnome doing his John Travolta impersonation)

Maybe I should enroll them both in clogging. I'm sure they wouldn't get beat up in Montana for clogging would they?